Friday, January 3, 2014

How not to run an open mic


Open mics are a hugely important part of comedy. They are basically the gym, where you go to work out your jokes. Chances are, any joke you hear a comic tell at a show has been worked on at an open mic room. On any given night, you can see the newest comic to the guy you just saw on Just for Laughs earlier in the day working on their act.

I don’t hit the open mic rooms anywhere near as much as I should. It’s not that I think I’m too good for them or anything. In fact, far from it. I need to get out a lot more, but It’s a case that I have a day job that keeps me very busy, I have a wife, a little boy and a mortgage, so I have to focus on what is going to make sure those things are taken care of.

Sure, it’s a bit of a cop out, but it’s also the reality that I just don’t have as much time to get out as some of the newer comics, who are in their 20’s with no real responsibilities other than student loans and making sure they have enough money for their case of Pabst Blue Ribbon and whatever product they need to keep their beards lice free. I wish I had that kind of time, but I don’t. It’s not a complaint, just a fact. So when I do get out to a room, I need to make the most of it.

That’s why I was so disappointed when I got out a while back. A room was having a very special show and was able to get a very well-known comic to close it out. I asked to be on the show because I knew that there would be a great crowd out to see this comic, so it would definitely give me a good gauge of my stuff.

When I get to the room, I see that there are 16 comics on the show, plus the headliner. 16 comics!! Holy Christ! That would be a long show if all the comics were headliners. But the reality is that with the exception of a handful, most were relatively new. But the saving grace in this is that the show was supposed to only last a couple of hours, with everybody doing 5 minute spots. The room was packed, so I stuck it out for a while.

At a show like that, the MC’s job is critical. They need to get the crowd warmed up quickly and then bring up all the comics in a way that keeps the show moving. They need to keep the show rolling when there is good momentum and bring the room back up after somebody shits the bed. The MC on this night decided to do a tight 30 off the top. And by tight 30, I mean meandering stories that don’t really have much in the way of punch lines or points. So we are already way over time, right out of the gate, with a crowd that really does want to laugh.

Comic after comic goes up with no real order, it’s almost like a lottery draw, rather than trying to put together any type of a cohesive show. With the exception of a couple, they just eat it hard. After each comic, the MC goes up and does meaningless time, without really bringing up the room. Understandably, about an hour and a half into the show, the headliner decides they want to go on. So the MC brings up the headliner who absolutely destroys for 30 minutes.

It was really inspiring to watch this person work. While I didn’t think the material was as sharp as I’ve seen them do in the past, just watching the way they squeezed every possible laugh out of it, without being too hammy or pandering to the crowd was amazing. Definitely gives you some incentive to work harder on the stuff I already have, and any stuff I’m writing.

Anyway, the headliner finishes, the MC goes up and announces a 15 minute intermission and then the rest of the comics, myself included would be going up. They should have just called the show right there. About half the crowd left, since they were really only there to see the headliner. Still, it’s a pretty decent crowd for this room. Against my better judgment, I decide to stick it out some more.

At about the 2:45 mark in the show, I asked the MC when I was supposed to go up and was told that it would be 3 more comics, then me. That would have been at least the 3:15 mark in a 2 hour show. I said fuck it and headed home, pissed off that a night had been more or less wasted. I suppose I could have stuck it out for a while longer for my spot, but it was getting late, I had an early morning day job committment, I was tired, the crowd was tired, and my enthusiasm was just gone. If I had been smart, I would have bailed right off the top and headed to another room where I could actually get some stuff accomplished.

If I were running this show, I would have cut the number of comics in half, ordered them in a way that balanced the talent and energy of the night, building into the world class headliner, and I would have had an MC that knew how to host a show. Those things would have helped the night live up to its potential, rather than how it turned out. This is just one more example of why I am getting completely disillusioned with the world of open mics.

If I had more time, I would try to run a room myself, and do it in a way that gave it the best chance of success. Things like having a separate space for the show, lights, a decent sound system, limiting the number of comics on a show, a decent MC, and putting some thought into how it actually runs.  But then again, what the hell do I know??

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